Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
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