Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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