Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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