Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
