OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
