u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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