nut hugger
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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