I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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