so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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