We should be called the Road Head Warriors
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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