I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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