I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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