I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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