I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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