i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
