jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
