About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
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i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
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I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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