Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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