she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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