Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Randomize