their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i can't believe i had my finger in that
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
