People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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