It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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