Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
