im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize