you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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