FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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