Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
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