Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
