Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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