How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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