Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
