It's Friday. Sex?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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