Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
