i was rollin on her like bob the builder
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
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all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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