that's an acceptable place to lick
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
