I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
