I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
