I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
