3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Randomize
