we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
