It's Friday. Sex?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize