Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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