Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(985): View more from Louisiana

If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.

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(913): View more from Kansas

we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar

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(510): View more from California

im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.

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These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell
Read it at the TFLN blog
(920): View more from Wisconsin

the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on

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(805): View more from California

I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.

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(315): View more from New York

He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...

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(513): View more from Ohio

I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.

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