Yo dont text me then not text me
i just had sex bonerless
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
