so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Randomize
