shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
