there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
