If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Randomize
