God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
